I’d like to say this happened fighting off a large crowd of over-amorous ladies, but in truth someone left the arm hanging out of my car door when I was dropping them home on New Years day. And how the people laughed, I’m sure, to see its tattered remains flapping like a stranded fish upon the rocks at traffic lights.
A neatly sliced half of a twenty-euro note, with which I tried to pay for some vegetables on the 2nd. I am picturing a beautiful girl with the other half tucked into the back pocket of her jeans, equally confused. She’ll save it for the day she tells her story to a stranger at a bar and finds the other half. We’ll run away and get married off the back of our shared fortune, and there’ll be whiskey and beer for all that want it as soon as we find some sellotape.