AJAX

14 July 05.

This is Not Fiction.

I just used AJAX to build a time-machine. And a teleporter. A teleporting time-machine. It’s pretty cool. Also, since I started using AJAX I’ve been winning the lottery pretty regularly. Girls seem pretty interested in AJAX, but I don’t really have time to take notice, what with all these exciting applications I’ve been developing.

I’m pretty sure AJAX is going to be able to fix this spam problem we’ve been having. Most of Internet Explorer’s rendering problems are also going to be solved by AJAX. More importantly, new evidence point to AJAX providing us with the unification theory and getting rid of all those irriting commenters off CSSVault.

I’ve recoded pretty much this whole site with AJAX. It now shows improvements in the 97th percentile on a whole range of generalised issues, from renderalbility to performance renewal optimisation. I can honestly say, with my hand on my heart, that there is no situation, scenario or schematic that will not benefit from full AJAX integration.

In conclusion: AJAX. AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX, AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX AJAX-AJAX. AJAX AJAX AJAX. AJAX AJAX AJAX, AJAX.

Comments

  1. Hey, perhaps AJAX could write some posts for my shitty journal, no?

    Anyway, first post I’ve actually read about AJAX. I always closed the tab when I stumbled over a serious one…

    — Sebastian Schmieg  Jul 18, 07:36 PM  #

  2. I’ve been using AJAX for my chronic constipation for a couple of months now, and couldn’t be happier!

    Bonus Constipation Joke:

    Q: What do constipation and mathematics have in common?
    A: You work them both out with a pencil.

    — Feaverish  Jul 18, 08:15 PM  #

  3. Sebastian: No. Some things are beyond even AJAX. Hopefully it’ll answer all the email I’ve been ignoring lately and attempt some of the actual paid work I’ve been putting off for the last couple of weeks though.

    Feaverish: Congratulations. First fecal-based joke on the site. I’m really surprised it took this long.

    — Pierce  Jul 18, 09:15 PM  #

  4. I hear the Israelis and Palestinians are using Ajax in the peace process. It’s not doing much negotiation-wise, but boy, they haven’t had to refresh a page for days!

    Feverish – that’s a good joke. The variation I know goes like this:

    Q: What does a mathematician do when they’re constipated?
    A: They work it out with a pencil.

    — James  Aug 17, 02:07 AM  #